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The 21st Century: Searching for Love ?

by Antonia

Most of us grew up watching films capturing fairytales, believing in true love and we’ll all live happily ever after. But does ‘the one’ really exist? And if so, where do we find it?

I have the view that maybe years ago, it was easier to find a match. Guys didn’t have so many options, and women didn’t have so many expectations. Life was simpler then, and we weren’t always looking for the next best thing. Men and women were more easily satisfied and usually when the guy asked you for a dance or a date, it was basically a sealed deal. A high percentage of the time they would marry at a young age so you wouldn’t really ‘date’ for a long time, it wasn’t the done thing. They’d marry, have children, that was life.

I’d say as soon as electronic devices like phones and computers were made, that’s when life changed. And not for the better on this particular subject…

People had access to the Internet. Mobile Phones. Text Messaging. Phone calls on the move. It was a phenomenon and you can understand why. Peoples lives and minds were opened up further than they could ever imagine, and along with any remarkable event, comes curiosity. Imagine being a wife at that time, and your husband starts going on his mobile device often. I’d be most perplexed, and in a way uncomfortable as you’re going into unknown territory.

Years on, here we are. Most people find love online, and even on apps! Tinder is a household name all on its own and I can understand why. People want to have options nowadays and want every box ticked. Is that too much to ask for? Probably not! We have the internet. Anything’s possible. We have the power as soon as we see an image of someone to either swipe right or left! No other information needed. Most of us are taught from a young age not to judge a book by its cover, yet here we are. Picking either ‘fun’ or a ‘husband’ at the swipe of a finger. No.1 dating app in the world.

It’s even harder finding love with the internet being around. Don’t get me wrong the internet is an astonishing thing, I now cannot imagine life without it. Is that a healthy attachment to have? Probably not. When you think about it, it’s all happened so fast. This kind of evolution. Not even 100 years have passed that people were rationing in the UK. Other parts of the world it only stopped a few years ago.

It brings up the question, have we got too much? I think so. Anything that pops into our heads we can type in search engines. Even things which aren’t supposed to be on the internet are. The most dangerous thing about it is that companies/governments cannot properly control what material is online. They haven’t established a real grasp on it, if any. And that’s when you know it’s out of control. Literally anything is online. The dark web is an unthinkable institution all on its own. Anything can happen or be uploaded there. How has that even materialised? We find it odd if someone doesn’t have social media. Some jobs don’t even accept you without any social media presence. It is classed as part of our identity now.

The internet reminds me of the film ‘The Purge’. The synopsis of the film is basically all forms of crimes are legal for 12 hours. Already some forms of that prohibited nature have become a reality on the internet. Can it be undone? I think its like a monster that billions of us are feeding, somewhat unknowingly.

What do you think? Comment below!

46 thoughts on “The 21st Century: Searching for Love ?”

  3. The generation today is always looking for the next best thing, only to find they should’ve kept the jewel they had. That is why most of them are single. People are never satisfied and don’t know how to appreciate authenticity. Sad world we love in and I agree with you. However, good men and women do exist. I have faith in that! Great post

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    1. I absolutely agree with everything you said! I couldn’t have said it better myself. Thankyouu for commenting 😊

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  6. If you want to meet real people, be real, go in the real world. You will find there are much more real men and women out there, who don’t want to follow the trend. We just need to be brave enough and not stop at the looks 😉
    the Internet is a great tool and we can learn how to use it intelligently. You’re very young but you are already asking the good questions, that’s a great point and a big advantage for your life. Keep it up Antonia.

    Liked by 3 people

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  9. I honestly don’t think it’s the Internet. I mean there’s so such much on there, but I don’t see how and why it can make someone “use someone” and all the other things that people do.

    I do believe when we were younger things seemed so simple with the Fairytales and that when that’s far from the case. In terms of why this “love” thing is impossible rn, I have no idea. I just think this generation is messed up and idk why

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  10. Great post. I just think the world is going way too fast and it’s stopping to let me off, just leaving me behind if I choose not to keep up. Like you said, there are positive things about the internet although I wish we weren’t building our future so dependent on it. Slow down people and look and actually speak to someone face to face.

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    1. Thankyouu!😊 I completely get what you’re saying! Such wise words. Thankyou for reading and commenting. Love hearing everyone’s view 😊

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  12. I’m really late – I didn’t even see this. Well, sometimes I’m not too proud of my ideals, but you know what – it’s my truth. I’ma be honest…the only thing that worked for me, was becoming ridiculous lol. My ideals weren’t ridiculous to me and other people that understood, but for the vast majority…I was told to lower them, that my standards were ridiculous. I was in a 3 year relationship, that went left very quickly, as soon as I decided to go back to placing myself – first. All hell broke loose, and that’s when I made up in my mind, to NEVER settle!!! Ever again lol. That was my fault (as my mother keeps reminding me). And it was, she warned me.

    When I began dating, I refused to apologize for my “high standards.” I knew they were high but what was the alternative? I realized was, well I had a small dating pool!! However, those pools of men were quality. They never gave me a hard time, about not deviating from what I wished to give and receive. They never once mentioned, “you need to lower x.y,z”. That’s when I began to enjoy dating lol.

    I enjoyed reading your post about this subject as it always intrigues mehhh lol.

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    1. Guys hardly ever truly want us to put ourselves first. It’s like they always want a certain amount of authority. But there are a small number who aren’t like that, and those are the few who’ll never say “you’re standards are too high”.
      The issue with most, is that their standards are too low!😂 We’re only on this earth once so why should I belittle myself to suit you?
      Thankyouu for reading and commenting😊

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      1. This is perfection!!! YASSS!!! Yes yes. I did learn a hard lesson and when I entered the dating scene once again, I absolutely refused!

        You’re soooo right, why were their standards so low? My response was always, “ohhh so you don’t like top shelf, you prefer the bottom shelf – I see.” Lol.

        Liked by 1 person

  13. New world tech, made people play hide and see. True love was what my grandparent had. Dear grandfather lived to ensure dear grandmother had everything she needed and she was content. Held hands, watched TV together, everyday of their life. Today we want everything when everything we need is near already. Need old fashion dating. Slow and easy love. I agree there is the purge create by the internet, strangers meeting unknown people. Never know who shall show-up.

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    1. Your grandparents lives and love sounds so beautiful and wholesome. We definitely need old fashioned dating back, but will we ever get it? I fear for my future offspring dating. It’s already almost impossible today!
      It’s great to know there’s still some people out their with amazing values!
      Thankyouu for reading and commenting!😊

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  16. I follow your view but, without internet, I just can not answer you, my opinion is all that we in our social everyday hanel, should not overdo it and always stay in the middle. our lives are in our hands !!!!((((((((((((((*L*))))))))))))))))

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