Those three words. Overused yet undersubscribed. You say you love, but how can one know if you actually feel it and most of all, mean it?
Dates, popcorn, movies, sharing a moment you can’t explain. Yes, that’s cliché, I have the t-shirt. But it’s not original. The outlined tried-and-tested script. Indoctrination even, as we’re all like sheep reciting the same picture perfect “love story”. Yuck. Where’s the bucket? Oh wait, someone’s got there before me yet again! Lets me original, your feelings are a good place to start.
You always wonder, how will I know? Will he show me? Will I know? Will it be written in the stars from the first moment our two worlds collide, sparks flying, magnetic, euphoric so you know it’s meant to be? Girl (or boy – inclusivity here), there’s more chance of me playing the lottery and winning the jackpot 10x over then believing in this fairytale, but it’s not impossible!
When you’re in love, it’s like a drug without being indebted. It’s effortless, sensical, contentment and most of all a feeling of unity, unconditional. But many emotions can be misinterpreted as love. Lust, dependency, trauma, loss, loneliness, even companionship rather than love.
People often say “I love you”, but if you asked them how or in what way? They’d answer, “I mean I love you”. They can’t express how, as somehow the word love, means xyz. The word is infinite. It’s so meaningful that if you ask the meaning behind it, I couldn’t begin. The issue is, anyone can say those three words. What makes it special and significant to you? The expression of love should be the conclusion of the love that has transpired between you both. It then has a deeper, sacred meaning. Whereas if “love” means “love”, the reliance on a four letter word to define and symbolise how your heart and soul feels, is all too easy and almost comical if that’s meant to be the touching part. It’s like the word is a double positive, rhetorical even. You shouldn’t question it as it speaks for itself.
A word is an inanimate object. Definition of word is as follows: The meaning of WORD is a speech sound or series of speech sounds that symbolises and communicates a meaning. So if I enquire about the meaning, you should know surely? The word can’t know for you, it doesn’t retain brain cells as it’s simply not live.
The unmasking of what truth lies beneath is difficult to decipher, as love is a beautiful thing. One you wish to not doubt or question due to the fear of losing the potential love of your life. Love may mean different things to different people, but it’s important to learn how you wish to be loved. Leaving that in the hands of others heightens the risk of being ill-treated due their definition of love. Abuse is much more prevalent in a wide range of relationships, as a consequence of the misuse of power and trust in another who you assume has your best interests at heart. There’s a fine line, especially when you’re emotionally blinkered.
By learning your own unique, healthy blueprint to what love looks like to you, you can then fine-tune any misconceptions or imitators. You can only love once you learn how you should be loved! Alexa, play ‘Flowers’ by Miley Cyrus.
What signs do you look for? How do you know? How can you tell? Have you ever been duped? Comment below!
Beauty File 
Love your post Antonia. My wife and I were in a rush this morning and we both mumbled “love you” without much care or feeling as she left to go to work. Something about it bothered me. Before she actually left, I walked out to her car to give her a hug and tell her that, even though there’s lots going on, I love her. Same words, but this time with meaning. I think that’s what love is … putting the two of you above the one. 😊😊😎😎
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Aww so glad to hear! It just shows how in touch you are with your emotions and you knew it didn’t feel right/complete that it was just mumbled in passing. And what’s interesting is that I’m sure that your wife felt and knew the difference when you came out to her car and took the time to say it with meaning, thought, care and accurate insight into what’s going on in life currently. There’s nothing worse than one partner almost dismissing the other, feeling like there’s so much going in life for example and the other feeling as though they’re overreacting or “making a mountain out of a molehill”, as it shows there’s a lack of mutual understanding or being on the same page.
Emphasis is key. Meaning can make those same three words feel all the more different. That’s when you feel butterflies, the special moment that is more than words! After all, what is love? The definition varies, but both parties should know what one another means. It’s not meant to be a trick question!
Aww thankyouu so much Brian, for sharing such a lovely insight and the perfect example of being in touch with your emotions; understanding when you don’t get your heartfelt definition across. Simply wonderful!🥹🤍
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My husband and I have been married 52 years. When we met at university, we just clicked. I knew he was the man I was destined to spend my life with. Has it been all sunshine and roses? Of course not, but we’ve overcome the difficulties together, growing closer in shared joy and sorrow. When he says he loves me, I know exactly what that means, and I can reciprocate. Like everything else, love changes with time. It becomes less frantic and more comfortable, more caring, and more rewarding. I wish everyone could find love as wonderful as mine.
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Love is so complex, most of the time “I love you” is said with no real meaning attached to it. Sad but true ❤
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WritingwiththeheartwithBrian nails it! Great post, Antonia, always thought-provoking.
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For me, words are important too along with the efforts. Saying I love you is amazingly important to say the least. And then the efforts. Going out of the way to see if the person is comfortable or not.
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Hello dear friend. I believe love is kindness. When we love someone. We will remind them
often. They are our reason to be alive. Their smile is our joy. We will listen to them, never lecture. We will make them feel. They will always have a safe place to know. A kind
woman can save a man life. Concern, kindness and listen. We must do.
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