The modern craze is, usually soon after starting a relationship is moving in together. Marriage isn’t on the cards until many years later or never. But who does this arrangement benefit?
I wholeheartedly understand once you fall in love, and you’re still in the honeymoon phase where you want to spend every waking moment with the person. They’re on your mind all the time, you want to show them the best version of yourself whenever you can. And when you know it’s the ‘the one’, you do start thinking about the future, like not being apart and coming together as one. Living together is a big part of that, but at what cost?
No matter how much I like or love someone, marriage is such an important factor for me, and men today aren’t really interested in that. It’s not on their radar. Or if they are they say ‘maybe far far down the line’. Bed hopping, partying and having fun is their priority. I don’t understand why someone who states that they’re so in love with you and can’t imagine a future without you, gets so choked up whenever I mention marriage? Actions speak louder than words, and your actions are speaking volumes. I shouldn’t even have to bring it up!
Nowadays, the majority of guys want to have their cake and eat it too. ‘Live together’. But really what is the difference between that and marriage which many people aren’t into nowadays? It’s the commitment. The expectations and the difference is mind boggling to them, huge in fact. Men will want to live with you but not marry you? Trust me that is no compliment, I find it quite insulting honestly. Once you move in with someone and live with them, you aren’t saving anything to look forward to in marriage. The excitement is completely gone.
One of the main reasons of getting hitched is living under one roof and seeing that person everyday. But if you’ve already achieved that, what would make a guy want to change that? If I were a guy and I found a woman who’s open to living together I wouldn’t even think of marriage. What for? You’re already getting everything you would with a ring on your finger. And sexual relations are more efficient if you live together. That’s probably the only reason they want to move in! Marriage and living together, there isn’t much in it, apart from in the eyes of the law and being more secure especially for the woman bearing the children.
Years ago, living together wouldn’t even be suggested to a woman. There’d be no such thing. Marriage is living together, full stop. Why did that change? Who does that benefit? I can’t see any advantages in this arrangement for women. Only for the man’s gain. Also if you split up, who moves out? Or would you have to wait until you sell the property to get your share? Where would you live until that happens? What happens if the person wants to move a new partner in soon after?
I know its hard, but waiting it out is always the best option. It’s extremely easy to move in with your partner, but if he truly loves you and see’s a future with you, he shouldn’t even suggest living together. It’s belittling and disrespectful. My mum always said “you’re not a cat, moving in with someone”. It’s funny but it’s awfully accurate. Your self worth, morals and beliefs shouldn’t be compromised for anyone. Those are very attractive traits, no matter what countless guys say. A high number of men in this modern world, make you feel like your expectations are too high or you should be lucky to have a guy like them. I’ve heard constantly, “i’m too young for that; moving in is the same; marriage will happen later down the line” (if at all). How are you too young for marriage but not for living together? Actions speak louder than words and never question your qualities and values! The right man will love all your qualities and cherish your worth.
What do you think? If you had daughters what would you want for them? What would you encourage your son to do? Do you prefer living together or marriage? Do you see them as the same? Comment Below!