They say you shouldn’t be guilty by association, but are we engrained to believe children from broken households are damaged goods?
I had this conversation months back, when hearing the implication of ones views, I was taken aback. I’m being viewed as higher risk and more unstable than a dual parent household purely because I was raised single-handedly. It’s absurd and quite disturbing, making me think how many people think like this but don’t voice it? Sidenote: this ideology came from someone raised by a single-parent.
From the day you’re born, I didn’t realise to some I may be viewed less worthy or reliable in a way, due to my childhood. Deep down throughout life, you know there’s a bias in how you’re seen, treated and acknowledged. I haven’t fallen from the sky via a martian, I’m human just like you. But I’m judged by my parents life choices and circumstances, that’s impossible. Ostracising a large fraction of mankind is barbaric.
Being raised by a married couple raises my status and chances statistically, as I’ve seen the goings on and can refer to my first hand knowledge of what makes a marriage work, meaning the chances of me having a successful, lifelong marriage is higher. But if you haven’t had that experience, everything you say and do is almost questioned, insignificant and diluted; entirely discrediting my mindset – “Where did you get that perspective from? Google?”.
This theory can have damaging, lasting effects. This ill-judged interpretation, can be detrimental regarding the hierarchy you assign to the population. Sure, statistically there is a favourable chance that you could carry past experiences from your childhood into future relationships, friendships or even in the workplace, having undesired effects. Equally, if your parents had an unhealthy marriage but stayed together for the sake of the kids for example, this could also affect how one views life. For that reason, this is why this concept can be deeply flawed by grouping people without knowing the full picture. You can’t AI generate emotional intelligence, discrepancies and information you do not know.
What do you think? Has your past tainted your future? Do you think this theory can draw an accurate conclusion? Have you experienced bias due to your childhood beyond your control? Comment below!
Beauty File 
I was raised by healthy family. If someone is in situation of haven’t one or two parents the most important thing is to take destiny in own hands.
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You make the point well that an intact family with issues is no more healthy than a family of divorce. I cringe whenever I see “broken household/broken home” as that implies those in it — including the children — are broken, which needn’t be the case if the only present parent creates a loving environment or if co-parenting is done intentionally.
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People are crazy and there are all kinds . . . but I would hope that they would judge me on the quality of my character and my, and my alone, actions. My family didn’t have a lot of money growing up so I’m not naive. I’ve seen the strange looks that people give you, but I’m also my own person. I would hope that after a point, people would judge me on my own and not whether I came from a one or two person household!!!
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How are you doing tonight? My name is Anthony Hopkins and I am from Dayton, Ohio. I am a 58 years old man who lived with my grandparents because my mother suffered from Post Pardomddepression as a person. I have spent 7 years of living with a lot of women in my grandparents household. As soon as I went to live with my mother, she had given birth to six other children by her husband. I remember when I was 7 years old, my mother’s husband at the time tried to kill me on numerous of occasions. I have a different father from my siblings. I still love them, but my nieces and nephews are a major problem. They were raised without any home training and manners. My family members use Vulgarity on a daily basis. My grandparents did not play with us behaviorally. She was in charge of her house. My mother and stepfather didn’t get along with each other. During the weekend of Thanksgiving of 1985, my stepfather stabbed me with a hookknife. The incident occurred on November 25, 1985. I almost lost my left arm during the incident. My half siblings and I don’t speak to each other and their kids do not respect me as an adult. My nieces and nephews have different fathers. All 38 of my nieces and nephews have different fathers.
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Wow- damaged goods? Your blog page tells me you are not damaged goods. I know a young man, Christopher, very well. He is my ideal son in law. A well educated, articulate, kind and caring man with an outstanding career. He was raised by my sister from another Mom, as a single, strong parent. The statistics against that happening are stacked against single moms. I know several people raised by single Moms who are the opposite of damaged goods and they are my friends. This blog was eye opening for me as I never considered the stigma placed on the children. Excellent blog post. Styron Powers
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It pierces the heart to witness individuals burdened by judgments stemming from circumstances beyond their control – the choices of their parents and the circumstances of their upbringing. In these moments, the world often blinds itself to the unique qualities, strengths, and untapped potential residing within each person. The journey of breaking free from these unfounded stereotypes is not just a personal struggle but a collective endeavor for a society that values understanding and inclusivity. It’s a poignant reminder that our true essence transcends the shadows cast by preconceived notions, and by dismantling these barriers, we pave the way for a world that embraces and celebrates the beauty of individuality.
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