Are Table Manners History?

Etiquette? Manners? Get with the times, it’s no longer trendy. So get your elbows out, we’re free to do as we please! Sorry I worded that too respectfully, give me time and I’ll even get my phone out; I can multitask, didn’t you know?

Society. Today. You choose to dine out to mark a special occasion, indulge in a date night or simply catch up with loved ones. Only to be met with a burping, unable to properly use silverware, elbows on table ….. who thinks manners is just remembering to say please and thank you when the waiter takes your order. When people assume the serviette is to be used as either a bib or tissue to blow their nose into whilst dining, as you can imagine is ever so pleasant. How’s your meal by the way?

More than half of Gen Z (60 per cent) feel that traditional manners are no longer of importance, according to a survey of 2,000 diners by Italian restaurant Prezzo, has found. The survey found that 77% of Gen Z diners didn’t care if people put their elbows on the table and 60% couldn’t care less about how someone holds their silverware. Table manners aren’t just disappearing among the younger crowd. The survey found that 32% of people of all ages never think about their table manners. On the contrary, over half of the British diners asked said they are upset about the lack of table manners they observe around them. Meanwhile, 49% of people asked said they wouldn’t date someone who had bad table manners. 

The survey showed that 48% of people were irked by loud chewing, 37% were annoyed when people used their food at the table and another 37% hated when people ate off others’ plates without asking. More than half of survey participants also hated it when people talked with food in their mouths, were very loud or snapped their fingers at servers. Besides elbows, another appendage Gen Z can’t seem to keep off the table is cell phones as 38% of young adult diners admitted to using their devices during a meal.  Mobile’s are very unhygienic. Roughly 10x more dirtier than a toilet seat. That simply highlights disregard and entitlement. Unequivocal of anyone else.

I have noticed these issues first-handedly unfortunately, I wondered why I was dealt with such misfortune. But oh no, it wasn’t an isolated incident, I’ve witnessed that more than not from all walks of life and backgrounds. When dating, I even concocted my own report almost on how common decent manners are, which cost nothing. Only one pulled out my chair. One. Their background was somewhat cultural and religious; on the cusp of Gen Y almost Gen Z. So even though in my perspective they were very modern in certain extents, the core ethics were very much permanently installed and normal practice, which was a breath of fresh air. But should that be the case? No! Simple mannerly actions shouldn’t be such a rarity that it leaves an imprint on your mind. As that reemphasises the state society is in. Remember, you’re more than a statistic.

It’s automatically assumed that when simple etiquette and manners aren’t present, that it’s a direct representation on how you were raised. Which in my opinion, is accurate to a degree. But as time goes on, you realise some have had a very good, hands-on upbringing and it’s simply independent choice once they mature into adulthood, they don’t believe these traditions or expectations are beneficial or a progressive method in communication and respect nowadays. I’ve also heard people say, I don’t open doors for someone as sometimes women profess it’s sexist and outdated. Of course, many things in life are dependent on your audience, but manners shouldn’t ever be one of them. It should be your default predisposition. Whoever you’re around, unless they make it apparent that they don’t acknowledge or appreciate these actions in a positive light, or find it patronising or condescending. You should always upkeep these values. As trust me, they never go out of fashion.

Both genders are often blinded by acts of kindness. They overlook what another human being has done purely for your satisfaction, to make your life easier, more comfortable and accommodating. Showing consideration, respect and kindness to your fellow diner(s) is a focal point to the experience. Without it, the bitter taste can linger, overriding the bells and whistles. When the right mannerly foundations aren’t in place, you do naturally judge poor characteristic and personality traits about somebody. There’s no excuse other than a lack of self-reflection and lack of interest towards others. Selfish characteristic? Quite possibly.

Manners and etiquette are like palate cleansers. It revitalises your taste buds for what’s to come, almost stimulating them for further delights. When the palate cleanser is dry, sour and out of date, you’d soon after ask for the bill. You know when your presence isn’t valued, don’t let other’s practice their ill-practiced methodology on you. Let them feed off their own compromised cleanser after all, it may be an acquired taste. The choice to become accustomed, is yours.

Follow your trusted guide, not a GPS with no service.

What do you think? What do manners mean to you? Is etiquette important to you? Do you think it’s overrated? Comment below!